Each time I give counsel to youths about waiting on God for a life partner, i hear replies like; "I don't really believe in this waiting on God stuff", "God told me he/she's my life partner but there's no positive response from him/her", "he's very caring and i know his family too well, he definitely is the one", "I'm too old to start waiting on God for a life partner, I'll take any good one that comes my way" etc....
What I have come to discover is that many youths are in a serious dilemma when it comes to the issue of relationships, some end up making the wrong choice of marriage and later discover they married a beast. So I'll just make it easy for as many as are concerned with this issue of utmost importance.
I'll give you steps to knowing if your partner is the right one for you and perhaps if you don't have one, these will help you.
1. Know your Purpose: before you even think of getting a life partner, you should at the very first know why God has created you and the purpose he meant for you to fulfill: "where the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable". If you have no idea where you are headed in life, everywhere may look like it and every guy or lady may look like the right person. Most times your true life partner usually has a connection with your purpose or vision. You can't marry someone who totally opposes your Vision or purpose.
2. Wait on God: I believe this is where many get confused because they always expect to hear a thunderous baritonic voice from heaven while some complain of getting no answer from God. You don’t always have to hear a voice although could be one of the ways He answers you , could be in dreams, visions, human witnesses but you also need to be careful to know the source of these. This is the reason building a relationship with God is very important, some folks have never even developed acquaintance with Him not to talk of a relationship with Him yet when issues come up they run to Him like they’ve been with Him all the while. Build a relationship with God and get to know how He communicates with you but most of all reach Him in prayers for your future partner. One secret to getting answers concerning your future partner from the prayer altar is by going to God neutral, with an unbiased mind. Don’t have your mind already made up about a person and then go to God to ask if he/she is the right one, you’ll probably hear yourself not God. Some already get involved romantically (very wrong) with the person and expect to get direction from God, you'll most probably hear your flesh. When asking God for the right person, go to Him plain, neutral and unbiased, God does not commune with an arrogant spirit.
3. Check for Peace: check within you if there is supernatural peace in your spirit each time you are with the person or praying about the person because whatever comes from God must be accompanied with peace of mind and ease. If you are feeling anxious, unrest about that person, you should watch, God might be telling you something.
4. Vision Alignment: be sure to check if your visions align with each other. Believe me when I say this is very important, it’s your major security for future peace. Marrying someone who opposes your vision is fatal, Amos 3:3 says "Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction? Take time to know your vision, your spouse is just on your way to fulfilling that vision.
5. Make yourself Approachable: hmmmmm, my dear brethren in the Lord there is a huge difference between Spirituality and Physical appearance. The fact that you are Holy Ghost filled, tongue blasting, bible loaded, Fire brand Christian does not mean you should dress in an awkward manner. You are addressed the way you dress. Make yourself presentable, pay attention to the various areas in your body, clean up yourself, and watch the odour that comes out of you. Just picture a man with a stench mouth odour walking up to a well dressed sister telling her “God told me you are my wife”, well her reply would be simple if she were me, “God told me I’m not”. No matter how spiritual you are, your appearance matters.
6. Character: Be conscious of your character, anointing is different from character and cannot replace it. Anointing gets him/her for you, character makes him/her stay.
Try your best to put all these in place and you are on your way to building a successful marriage. But if you’ve still got questions, you can send an email.
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